Zaibunnisa

The first person I think of is my mother, Zaibunnisa. She was born in the village of Sanjarpur in the Azamgarh district of Uttar Pradesh towards the end of the nineteenth century and passed away in Delhi on October 8, 1985, at nearly one hundred years of age.

Although her formal education was limited, she was an exceptionally intelligent and courageous woman. Like the noble women of earlier times, she fully embodied traditional virtues.

My mother possessed all the moral qualities commonly associated with women of the past. However, she also displayed a trait not always found among mothers: she did not indulge her children. She never resorted to physical punishment, but neither did she spoil us through excessive affection. She often said, “I have always kept my children under firm discipline.”

This balance between affection and firmness proved invaluable to me, as it enabled her to shape my character to a great degree. Although she was unfamiliar with the modern term “character-building” because of her limited formal education, she practised it instinctively. She closely monitored my moral conduct and made a conscious effort to cultivate the best human qualities in me. For example, to instil in me the values of hard work and humility, she bought two goats and made me responsible for taking them out to graze. Because of my mother’s approach, I too had the humble experience of tending goats as a child.

My mother never told a lie in her life. She never engaged in hypocrisy or double standards. When it came to principles, her conduct was consistently firm. She worked hard and disliked asking others for help. Her honesty was so genuine that no one could prevent her from speaking openly and truthfully. Although she was unfamiliar with the phrase “noble character,” she embodied it throughout her life.

By nature, she showed little concern for our material future. As far as I can recall, she never once encouraged me to pursue wealth. However, when it came to moral conduct, she was extremely vigilant. Day and night, she kept a strict moral watch over me and could not tolerate even the slightest trace of improper behaviour in her children.

My father, Fariduddin Khan, passed away during my childhood, on December 30, 1929.

From my birth in 1925 until I was about fifteen years old, I lived with my mother in the village. Consequently, my entire early childhood was spent under her care. As a result, those human qualities became deeply rooted in my character—qualities that the ancient Arabs called al-muru’ah, or nobility of character.

This upbringing shaped the principles by which I came to live. Lying seemed beneath human dignity, while honesty became second nature to me. Realism became an integral part of my character. I learned to value the honest acknowledgment of facts and found it difficult to tolerate any denial of truth. It would therefore not be an overstatement to say that, in my childhood, I acquired from my mother those natural qualities of character which the Hadith recognizes as marks of human excellence even before the advent of Islam. (Musnad Ahmad, Hadith No. 10295) In other words, my mother instilled these qualities in me before I came to understand religion for myself.

The moral virtues she displayed were, in earlier times, common among women; in that sense, she was not exceptional. However, in one respect she certainly was exceptional: she never pampered her children. She loved us as every mother does, but she also understood that excessive indulgence spoils children.

Therefore, her approach towards us was that of a practical and realistic mother. She often said, “I have always kept my children under firm discipline.” This distinctive quality enabled her to become a mother who shaped my character.

To pursue a divinely inspired mission, one must possess a personality of unwavering integrity—free from opportunism, firmly grounded in truthfulness, deeply sensitive to principles, entirely devoid of any spirit of exploitation, and filled with compassion and goodwill towards humanity.

As an expression of gratitude, I can say that my mother’s upbringing instilled these very qualities in me. As mentioned earlier, she was a woman with little formal education who spent her entire life in a village setting. Therefore, she did not consciously understand the broader significance of these moral virtues; she simply acted according to her natural instincts. Still, the truth remains that if she had not shaped my character in this manner, I would never have been able to carry out the mission of conveying God’s message and undertake the constructive work to which I later dedicated my life.

A mission like Al-Risala can only be built upon a foundation of strong moral character. There are two types of character: sincere and hypocritical. A person relying on hypocritical character may succeed in running a political venture, but a true religious mission must be rooted in sincerity. Without noble character, there can be no genuine mission; where character is absent, the mission itself ceases to exist.

In my experience, every mother potentially possesses the same qualities that I have described in relation to my own mother. However, one common weakness prevents mothers from playing the constructive role in their children’s lives that my mother played in mine. That weakness is excessive pampering. Every mother has immense love for her child. My mother’s distinguishing quality was that she kept her love under the guidance of reason. She was therefore able to avoid the destructive mistake of excessive pampering.

I believe that, merely by overcoming this one weakness, mothers can raise an entirely new generation within their own lifetime—a generation consisting of the kind of individuals needed to build a righteous society.

It is a well-known fact that, during the formative period of their lives, all human beings are brought up under the care and guidance of their mothers. Mothers can shape their children in whichever direction they choose. In the human system, nature has, as it were, entrusted mothers with the responsibility of shaping human beings and has also endowed them with the abilities necessary for this task.

I have personally experienced this truth in my own life. In my view, every mother naturally possesses the qualities required to fulfill this role. Only one thing prevents mothers from performing this constructive responsibility: the unnecessary pampering of their children.